COMIC RELIEF

Circus time

• Which circus performers can see in the dark?

(The acro-bats!)

• Did you hear about the human cannonball?

(He got fired!)

• Did you hear about the fire at the circus?

(The heat was in-tents!)

• What happened to the elephant who ran away with the circus?

(The police made him bring it back!)

• What happened when the magician got mad?

(She pulled her hare out!)

English language is so great!

A mother picks her son from school.

“How was your English test today?” She asked

“It was easy except I had trouble on this one difficult question”

“What did it ask?” The mother replied

“It asked for the past tense of think”

“What did you answer it as?” The mother says.

“I couldn’t really figure it out. I thought and thought and thought and thought, and I finally wrote thunk.”

Math rules

A mathematician and a physicist were arguing over whose field of study was better.

A mathematician and a physicist were arguing over whose field of study was better. They decided to settle the argument by posing questions. The mathematician went first, and posed a complicated mathematical problem. With a great deal of effort, several books of mathematical tables and techniques, and a few hours, the physicist gave the solved problem to the mathematician, who was duly impressed.

“All right, my turn. Here’s the problem: you have a pot of water on the stove, at 60 F. You want to heat it up to 70 F. What do you do?” The mathematician replied, “Oh, that’s easy. You turn the stove on. Fourier’s equations govern how heat transfers from the stove to the pot, and you can solve them numerically to find out how long it takes for the water to reach 70 F.” The physicist then asks, “All right, so what if the water is at 65 F?”

“Oh, that’s even easier. You take the pot of water, stick it in the refrigerator until it cools down to 60 F, and then it simplifies to the previous problem!”