If B comes to know about Z’s indecent behaviour, he will be very angry and will pressurize me to leave this job...
I am harassed by my colleague
Dear Guru,
I am a 26-year-old working girl. I belong to a middle-class family. I am a graduate and have been working for five years. I am engaged to my cousin, B. Our engagement was arranged by our parents. The wedding will take place next year. I don’t love my fiancé but I don’t dislike him either. He is a decent guy and earns well. My problem is related to my male colleague, Z. He is in his 40s and IS a flirt. Despite knowing that I am engaged, he tries to be fresh with me. I try to avoid talking to him but since we work in the same office it’s very difficult to ignore him. Sometimes his bad jokes put me in an awkward position. I am afraid of talking to my boss as Z is very close to him. I can’t resign also as this job is important for me, and it’s difficult to find a good job. Guru, I really don’t know how to deal with Z. I am also scared of talking to my family in this regard. If B comes to know about Z’s indecent behaviour, he will be very angry and will pressurize me to leave this job. Z has literally made my life so miserable. What should I do?
Scared G
Dear Scared G,
You must have heard that ‘God helps those who help themselves’. This phrase emphasises the importance of self-initiative and self-reliance. My dear, this world is full of lecherous men like Z and wherever you go, you are bound to meet them. So, what one can do? The answer is simple – just face them boldly. Instead of feeling uncomfortable by Z’s crude jokes, ask him loudly what he means in front of others; this will surely embarrass him and he will refrain from cracking jokes in future. Be assertive and don’t be threatened by Z. Men like Z actually are spineless and they usually tease timid girls like you. Don’t remain silent. People who remain silent actually encourage perpetrators to go on with their offensive activities. Tell your boss about Z. Tell him how uncomfortable you feel in his presence. I am sure your boss will listen to you. If he doesn’t, then you can always talk to office management. In every organisation there are certain rules to safeguard employees’ rights. Don’t be afraid of losing your job. No one can fire you; in fact, people will respect you more for being so brave. Good luck!
I am in love with my professor
Hi Guru,
I am an 18-year-old college going girl. I belong to a well-off family. I am a very pretty girl, so many boys like me but I don’t like any one of them. I have fallen in love with my college professor. He has an impressive personality. He is around 30 years old and is still single. I want to marry him but he is not inclined towards me. He is friendly with his students but very reserved at the same time. I wrote a love note to him, which he ignored. How can I get his attention?
Little Princess in Love
Dear Little Princess in Love,
I can’t blame you for being in love with your professor. At your age, young girls do get attracted by older men. And I am not surprised if you are charmed by your professor’s magnetic personality. Usually, it’s not love; it’s infatuation. My dear, you need to understand that your professor is a respectable and decent man who does not want to get himself involved with his students. For him, you are just a student and nothing more than that. The fact that he ignored your love letter clearly indicates that he is simply not interested in you. Don’t get so upset. I guess it is best in your interest if you forget the idea of falling in love and concentrate on your studies. Believe me it’s just a passing fancy. Good luck!
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