After being interviewed by the school administration, the teaching prospect said, “Let me see if I’ve got this right: you want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behaviour
Let her pray
After being interviewed by the school administration, the teaching prospect said, “Let me see if I’ve got this right: you want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behaviour, observe them for signs of abuse, monitor their dress habits, and instill in them a love for learning. You want me to check their backpacks for weapons, wage war on drugs, and raise their sense of self-esteem and personal pride.
You want me to teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and how to register to vote, balance a checkbook and apply for a job. You want me to check their heads for lice, recognise signs of anti-social behaviour, and make sure that they all pass the state exams.
You want me to provide them with an equal education, regardless of their handicaps, and communicate regularly with their parents by letter, telephone, newsletter and report card.
You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard, a bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for food stamps. You want me to do all this, and then you tell me that I CAN’T PRAY?”
Clean restrooms ahead
Two guys were going on a road trip to Florida. A buddy told them that they’d be fine as long as they paid close attention to the road signs along the way.
They’d driven 30 miles when they saw one that read “Clean Restrooms Ahead”.
Two months later, they arrived in Florida exhausted, having used up 86 bottles of Windex, 267 rolls of paper towels, and three cases of toilet-bowl cleaner.
Total restrooms cleaned: 450.
Just doing their jobs
Two salesmen were going door to door, and knocked on the door of a woman who was not happy to see them. She told them in certain terms that she did not want to hear their offer and slammed the door in their faces. To her surprise, however, the door did not close and, in fact, bounced back open. She tried again, really put her back into it, and slammed the door again with the same result — the door bounced back open.
Convinced, these rude people were sticking their foot in the door, she reared back to give it a slam that would teach them a lesson, when one of them said: “Ma’am, before you do that again, you need to move your cat.”
