'Sopranos' star Jamie-Lynn Sigler recalls 'disastrous' first marriage that took a toll

Jamie-Lynn Sigler is opening up about her first "toxic and complicated" marriage that made her imagine her own death in order to get rid of it.

​The How I Met Your Mother alum, who got married at the age of 22 to her former finance manager A.J. Discala, recalled that her three-year marriage to her manager was "disastrous," which left her on the verge of help and support.

​During a recent chat with US Weekly, she was asked if she looks back at the death fantasy she used to imagine back then, as she revealed in her new memoir. Sigler replied, "I hadn’t relived that moment until I wrote it. It wasn’t even really about suicide. It was a cry for help. I needed someone to know how terrified and overwhelmed I was."

​The Divorce Invitation actress further explained that if she had stayed in the marriage for a few more years, she might not have "survived."

​"A marriage at 20 is still a marriage. I needed a lot of proof to leave. When I went through his phone, I knew something shady was going on. All women feel that way," she continued, "I wanted to share that not to bash him, but for other women. I felt like such a failure all the time, but I understood I was not going to survive much longer if I stayed in that marriage. I think he knew that, too."

​She revealed that at the time, she desperately needed her former husband and Discala took advantage of it.

​"I desperately needed him at that time, so I can’t be like, 'What were you thinking?'

​"I know what I needed, and he provided a lot of that for me. Can I look back and see a young girl who was possibly being taken advantage of? Yes, but I also don’t think that he really thought that was happening."

​At last, she articulated her thoughts that they both got "caught up in a ride".

​The MeSsy podcast host is currently married to former baseball player Cutter Dykstra. They tied the knot in 2016 and share two sons, Beau and Jack.