Is my girlfriend having an affair?
I am 25 years old. I have been reading Us magazine since my school days and am still hooked to it. I am from a middle class family and have been working in a private bank since four years. I have done BBA and I attend evening MBA classes after work. Guru, I am in love with a colleague of mine, B. She is 23 years old and is very pretty. I am really serious about her. She is aware of my feelings and is quite friendly with me. I have all the intentions of marrying her, but a few days back I got the biggest surprise of my life. One day I came to office a bit early whereas B had already arrived. She was talking on the phone with someone and it was very clear that she was in a deep conversation. The moment she realised that I was there she put the phone down quickly. When I asked her whom she was talking to, she got confused and said that she was talking to her best friend, but her reply did not satisfy me. Guru, from that day I have been having all kinds of negative thoughts. I think she is having an affair with someone. I have also come to know that she had boyfriends in the past. Sometimes I feel I have been fooled by her. B has noticed a change in my behaviour and she seems concerned. I still love her but now I am having second thoughts about sending my proposal. What should I do?
Victim of Love
Dear Victim of Love,
Relax, young man. You are getting suspicious without any reason. Did you hear clearly whom she was talking to? If no, then you should not doubt her. Maybe she was talking to her best friend and it’s quite possible that she did not want to tell you about it. It seems normal to me as all people have their own private life and you must respect B’s privacy. And why are you so concerned about her past? One shouldn’t be judgemental. You are an educated man. Don’t think and behave like a narrow-minded guy. If you are having second thoughts about her, why don’t you talk to her openly? It’s better to address your apprehensions and insecurities rather than being silent about it. If you really love her, accept her with an open heart, (without thinking about her past). All relationships are based on mutual trust. If there is no trust, there is no relationship. If you really want to take your relationship with B to the next level, I strongly recommend that you talk to B and clear your mind of all the negative thoughts about her. Rest is up to you. Good luck!
How can I earn extra bucks?
I am a huge fan of your column. I am 20 years old and am a student of B.com (part II). I belong to a middle class family. I am thankful to my parents for getting me into a good college and for taking care of my needs, but at times I feel frustrated. All my friends are from well-off families and they always make picnic and party plans. Money is not an issue for them but it is an issue for me. I get limited pocket money and most of the time I am broke and it really bugs me. I don’t like asking my parents for extra money. Is there any way to earn some extra bucks? I don’t want to give tuitions, so suggest something else. Please help me out.
Dear Broke Boy,
Normally, in our society, students depend on their parents for everything - from their tuition fee to their food and clothing. Entertainment is a separate area altogether. Children of well-off families or the privileged ones are usually more pampered as they have easy access to money. However, children of middle class families feel a bit left out as their parents have limited source of income. You can’t imagine how students of poor families survive. My dear, it’s not easy these days to bear the expenses of private education. If you want to earn some extra bucks for entertainment purposes, you can find a part time job at some fast food chain or at a departmental store. But don’t neglect your studies in the process. Good luck!
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