I have been reading your column since I was a teenager. Now I am 30, but still find your column amazing....
I am desperately in love
Dear Guru,
I have been reading your column since I was a teenager. Now I am 30, but still find your column amazing. I am working in a bank and am still not married. My friends tell me that I am a chronic bachelor. Frankly speaking, I never wanted to get married and have been enjoying flirting around but, of late, I have been thinking seriously about getting married. Actually I have fallen in love with a very charming woman - P - but the problem is that she is already married and is eight years older to me. She is around 38 years old and is married to a businessman. She is a bored housewife as her hubby has no time for her. He is always busy with his business meetings and deals. We happened to meet at a friend’s get together where I was attracted by her graceful personality. We clicked and fell in love there and then. Now, it’s been six months that we have been seeing each other. She really enjoys my company. She has also shared the problems of her marital life with me. She is very unhappy with her promiscuous husband who has been caught many a time with other women. Guru, she says that she truly loves me but she always avoids the subject of getting married to me when I tell her to get divorce from her husband. I don’t understand why she is doing this. When she is so unhappy with her husband then why is she not taking divorce? I am getting frustrated. Please help.
Anxious Lover
Dear Anxious Lover,
Wake up, man, and take a reality check. The woman you are in love with is married and is well settled in her life. She is only using you and is having a good time at your expense. If her husband is cheating on her then what is she doing with you? She is also being unfaithful to her husband.
I don’t see any point in continuing this relationship. She will never leave her husband for you. Had she really been unhappy she would have left him long time ago. She is only making a fool out of you. She doesn’t want to leave a luxurious life. I know you can give her a decent living but not an opulent one that she is used to. So, be sensible and break up with her before she breaks your heart. And, next time, try to fall in love with a single woman. Good luck!
She is such a snob
Salam Guru,
I am 20 years old. I am a student of Mass Communication in one of the universities of Karachi. I am a very bright student and I am very popular among my teachers. They all like me because I show keen interest in my studies and am respectful to everyone. I am friendly with all my class fellows except for one girl, F. She happens to be a daughter of some big feudal landlord. This is the first time that she has come to a big city for higher education. Initially, I tried to be friendly with her but then I noticed that she has a strange attitude towards me. Since she is rich and pretty, she thinks too highly of herself. She only talks to those who are from well-off families. Since I belong to a middle class family, she gives me no importance. Guru, sometimes her rude attitude bothers me. Despite being an average student, she looks down upon me. It really hurts me when I see my teachers giving favours to her just because her father is an influential man. Guru, how should I deal with her?
Smart Girl
Dear Smart Girl,
In life you meet all kind of people. Some win your heart with their kindness and some just surprise you with their strange attitude. F is one shallow girl and you should not bother about her. The best way to deal with her is to give her a cold shoulder. If she thinks too highly of herself then you are also not an insignificant person. Who cares if she is pretty or if she is a daughter of some feudal lord? What does she have to show off on her own? Nothing! People who make friends only because of their high status are actually superficial people. If your teachers pay her extra attention or do favours to her, fret not, there is no comparison between F and you. Your teachers genuinely like you whereas in case of F they are just pretending. Try to understand your teachers’ position; they are doing favour to F only because of her father’s influence. So, this thing should not bother you at all. You are an intelligent girl and should realise that your intelligence is your asset. So be proud of who you are, and don’t waste your precious time thinking about irrelevant people like F. Good luck!
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