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By US Desk
Fri, 03, 18

Too good to be true

Salam Guru,

I am a 21-year-old girl. I belong to a middle class family. I have done graduation and these days I am teaching in a school; I also plan to do my Masters. My parents work and I have three younger brothers who are studying.

Guru, I have a problem which is related to my school Principal. He is very senior and everyone respects him. When I joined school, he helped me a lot in settling down. He has always been kind to me, but for the past few weeks he has been extra sweet with me. He has just given me a pay raise (to my surprise as I was not expecting it before completing a year). He says that he sees a lot of potential in me.

Guru, I am happy but I am also a bit apprehensive. Do you think it is a case of too good to be true? Or is he just being nice to me without any ulterior motives? Well, he is a decent man and has a clean reputation. But I have heard so many stories about lecherous men that I am now too scared of men, especially old men. Guru, is there something wrong with me or is this ok that I feel this way? Should I leave my job? I have no other issues with this job; I am just confused. Please help.

Scared Girl

Dear Scared Girl,

There is so much negativity in our minds that even if someone is being nice with us, we start judging him/her. It is actually not your fault. In a way it’s good - not to trust everyone, but it does not mean that you should start suspecting your own Principal.

I don’t think there is any ulterior motive involved in your case. You cannot blame a man only on your illusions. If you are happy in your job, then you should not worry about your principal’s benevolent behaviour towards you. And who knows he genuinely likes you and sees a lot of potential in you and hence a pay raise! You have to believe in yourself. Don’t think of leaving such a good job. Take out all the negative thoughts out of your mind and focus on your work. Good luck!

How can I say No?

Dear Guru,

I am an 18-year-old college going girl. I live with my parents and grandparents and an aunt. I belong to a middle class family.

Guru, I am facing a difficult situation. Actually my best friend H is getting engaged. Her in-laws are based in Lahore and they are coming to Karachi for the engagement. H’s relatives are also coming to attend the engagement since she is the first one to get engaged in her family, so everyone is excited.

Now, the problem is that H has asked me if they three of her cousins could stay at my house for two days. Guru, I live in a small house and there are no extra bedrooms in our house. I am in a fix. How can I say no to my friend? I don’t want to upset her but I have no authority in my house. Should I talk to my mom about it or should I plainly refuse her? What should I do? Please help.

Girl in a Fix

Dear Girl in a Fix,

There are few things in life which you need to tackle very tactfully and diplomatically and one of them is friendship. I can understand your predicament but you have to deal with it very sensibly so that it will not affect your friendship with your best friend. Of course you cannot bluntly say ‘No’ to your friend. It will look very odd and rude.

I think you should talk to your mother about it. She might give you a sound advice. Well, she may allow you to keep your friends’ cousins for a day or two. You can adjust them in your bedroom. It shouldn’t be a big issue. I hope the matter will be solved amicably. Good luck!

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