Remembering Talat Rao

The rich legacy that our dear mother — Talat Rao — left us two years ago can never be weighed in materialism, as she shunned such worldly wealth. Being well versed in Gandhism, Christology, Buddhism and the more humble faiths amongst world religions, her cottage was an epitome of her beliefs. Her life was a metaphor for us siblings to emulate and pass on to her grandkids. Being dispersed like chaff hardly portrays Mum's beliefs!

She was honest, and being tall, with a graceful gait and stature, nicknamed 'The Brigadier' in her College days, she was certainly a domineering personality with the stunning looks of a goddess!

She was indeed imbued with a humane nature rounded off physically with incredible beauty. I well remember how all heads would turn when she graced the streets, roads and shopping malls of Teheran, Iran, Rawalpindi and Islamabad whether enrobed gracefully in a 'Sari' or any other dress.

Her determination, positive attitude and disciplined, positive principles worked well for us despite strong opposition from those around her. She never took the 'right' decision, but arrived at her own decision and made it 'right'. I speak here strictly of 'conventional' or 'expected' decisions as contrary to Mum's individuality and uniqueness in unconventional thinking and decision making in specific circumstances. Her top priority was her mother and children whom she served with such disciplined optimism that the results were commendable indeed.

Selflessness and philanthropy were her strong character traits and she opened up her 'cottage' doors to all — specially the under-privileged — where she continued her English Language teaching at home in Rawalpindi. The 'cottage' at Sarwar Road took the symbolic shape and significance of the 'Oracle' at Delphi in ancient Greece, disseminating principles of knowledge, wisdom and intellectualism. Our three-roomed cottage was her 'pride' and her 'palace', and eminent personalities and various other government servants holding honourable posts had no qualms about having tea or coffee at Sarwar Road. At these moments she would recall her past in post second World War Pindi: the balls at the Rawalpindi Club, tea, lunch and dinner at their friends, their home at the Cantonment Hospital, Sams and LinTots at Murree, Blueberry Hill at Bhurban and the Dutch Mill Hill Mission and Father Thyssen at the St.Mary's Cambridge School on Murree Road. She lived in this utopian world of hers as it provided plenty of emotional sustenance for her to carry on. Such Romantic idealism was one of the prime factors that helped her to reach the limits of her earthly existence.

Being against materialistic aggrandisement she spent freely on us kids with monthly and fortnightly 'splurges' to Kohsar Market, United Bakery etc in Islamabad. While in the Summer vacations she beat the heat into a world of shady escapism in the Valleys of Kaghan and Swat, Murree and the Galiats, with her favourite summer get-away at Dunga Gali. Mum lived within her limitations, building on what she had access to, and never aspired for a trip to the Alps or the Rockies. She instilled in us a sense of patriotic pride for our country via its natural beauty while the rich legacy of knowledge was received with a vast collection of books, magazines and encyclopaedias on Music, Dance, Art, History, Literature, Sports and Religion. This was the myriad of impressions with which she enriched our lives.

Her firm belief in the Keatsian philosophy of 'momentary happiness' with us and friends brought her sheer joy since such moments like 'Beauty' are transitory. Being her favourite poet from the 'younger' group of the Romantics, Keats's idealism of 'Beauty is Truth and Truth is Beauty' is exactly what Mum was, and, that is why he so ironically emphasizes: ' that is all ye need to know on earth'. Truth in simplicity!

She was opposed to aggression and war which is why the more peaceful faiths attracted her, and, therefore brought her in touch with renowned peace activists like, Mehboob Francis Sada [late] ex-Director of the Christian Study Centre who encouraged and invited her to speak on his various programs on inter-faith harmony and peaceful co-existence. In her zealous quest for the Truth she had evidently enlightened herself on the different levels, strata or states of attaining 'Nirvana', 'Samadhi', or the 'Truth' through an in-depth scholarly study of the inter-textual commonalities existing in the Holy Scriptures. This simple 'common' revelation achieved through her voracious appetite for reading helped her to strongly adhere to her professed Baptismal faith at mid life. Mum had finally elevated herself as an enlightened individual! She was and will always be Greatness in Humility.

I guess we should be grateful for memories, and our ability to recall, as that is what will keep Mum alive and around us all the time. Not only this, but let us pass her priceless values on to her grandkids, Aahib, Zoella and Hubab, and hope that they will always be a force of unification and symbolize the 'House that was built on the Rock', as that is exactly how Mum would want us all to be.

May God rest her peaceful soul in quietude and enable us to flourish in her rich legacy. Mother, Grandmother, we still dearly miss you.

  — Dr.Sanjay Rao