Love, attachments and heartbreaks

By Aleezeh Fatimah Hashmi
Fri, 01, 22

Yet, when I think of love, I think of all the attachments I had and then how I broke my heart into pieces...

Love, attachments and heartbreaks


If I talk about love, I would like to start with myself. I love, love. I am made up of love. If I could, I would have filled this whole world with flowers. I would have made sure tears never fall from the eyes of my beloved. I would have saved my beloved from stones and would have kept him under the petals of the softest flowers to exist in the universe. Yet, when I think of love, I think of all the attachments I had and then how I broke my heart into pieces.

Love is strange. There are plenty of words for love in each language and each word makes you feel something. And, when words about love can make you feel, imagine what love is capable of doing. Imagine the power love holds. I have read, heard and watched so much about love and I have learned love has the power to heal, to break, to save, to kill. I often wonder if love actually is this powerful or have we given it the power to be this powerful? So powerful that it ends up killing a heart?

Maybe not. Maybe it is not love that holds power; maybe it’s the people who experience this feeling, the people who grant the privilege of getting their hearts broken by the ones they love. Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice said and I quote, “It’ll be a privilege to get my heart broken by you.” And ever since I have read it, I have felt it as the purest form of love, a love where hearts heal, grow and live. But, then, why are hearts broken the most when they’re in love? Why is something that is supposed to heal wounds ends up giving unimaginable misery?


Attachment is the element that makes love intense and is a huge reason why emotional dependency comes into being. We have closely related love with emotional dependency, majorly because, in today’s era, almost every third person has been through emotional, mental, physical or multiple types of abuse. Hence, due to the natural need of love that humans possess plus the deprivation of emotionally intense connections, people settle down for the barest minimum. Because, when you’re deprived of something, you look for it desperately, and you want it terribly. However, once you have it, you cling on to it, and want to make it last longer than it is destined to.

But again, does it? Does it last longer than it should? No. It fades away. It goes away, leaving us wondering what we did wrong and where we went wrong until a new attachment is formed. The cycle is repeated until our torn, tired and helpless hearts finally accept that love doesn’t work that way.

Love isn’t something which fades away over one argument, one mistake, one mishap, one harsh wave of life. Instead, with each new obstacle, it grows in a direction one can only imagine. It intensifies the affection in a way one can only think of, so if it fades away when times are hard, it isn’t love. It is the cruelty of the world wrapped in the shiny package of delusion.

May our hearts find hearts that understand our languages!