That’s not fun

A fighter pilot finishes refueling from a refueling plane.

The fighter pilot, feeling superior, gets on the radio and tells the refueling pilot to watch this. The fighter pilot goes through an array of aerial acrobatics. Tight twists, loops, and s-curves. He gets back on the radio and tells the refueling pilot he must be jealous because his plane can’t do that.

The refueling pilot says, “Oh yeah, watch this!” For the next 10 minutes the refueling plane flew straight as an arrow. Then the pilot got on the radio and said, “Did you see that?” The fighter pilot, confused, said, “You just flew straight. That’s not fun.” The refueling pilot said, “No, I got up and went to the bathroom and grabbed my steak off the stove and had dinner.”

Talking clock

A student was lucky to find a decent accommodation with a cheap rent. His colleagues came to visit him and he was showing them the house. “This is the kitchen. This is the bedroom. And this one is the living room.”

“And what is the hammer and this pot for? What are you going to do with them?” one of his colleagues asked. “This is a talking clock.”

“I have never seen a clock like that. Can you show me how it works?” “Sure. Look,” the student said.

He took the hammer and struck at the pot with all his strength. Then a voice was heard from the other side, “What you are doing? Are you crazy? It is half past one in the night, you idiot!”