A woman was found guilty in traffic court and when asked for her occupation she said she was a schoolteacher....
COMIC RELIEF
A doctor opens a clinic and puts a sign outside that reads “GET TREATMENT FOR $20 - IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100.”
A lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.
Lawyer: “I have lost my sense of taste.”
Doctor: “Nurse, bring medicine from box No. 14 and put three drops in patient’s mouth.”
Lawyer: “Ugh. this is kerosene.”
Doctor: “Congrats, your sense of taste is restored. Give me my $20.”
The annoyed lawyer goes back after a few days to try to recover his money.
Lawyer: “I have lost my memory. I can’t remember anything.”
Doctor: “Nurse, bring medicine from box No. 14 and put three drops in his mouth.”
Lawyer (annoyed): “This is kerosene. You gave this to me last time for restoring my taste.”
Doctor: “Congrats. You got your memory back. Give me $20.”
The fuming lawyer pays him, then comes back a week later determined to get back $100.
Lawyer: “My eyesight has become very weak I cannot see at all.”
Doctor: “Well, I don’t have any medicine for that, so take this $100.”
Lawyer (staring at the note): “But this is $20, not $100!”
Doctor: “Congrats, your eyesight is restored. Give me $20”
Traffic court
A woman was found guilty in traffic court and when asked for her occupation she said she was a schoolteacher.
The judge rose from the bench. “Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court.”
He smiled with delight. “Now sit down at that table and write, ‘I will not run a red light’ five hundred times.”
I live in constant fear that one day while I’m least suspecting it someone might break in to burglarize and kill my mother-in-law. She lives at 375 Woodland Ave in the light blue house. She has only one dog who is friendly and has no alarm set. She always leaves the kitchen window unlocked and without screen, sleeps on the second floor in the bedroom next to the bathroom which is where she keeps all her jewellery hidden behind the mirror.
