How can you navigate serious impacts of divorce without sacrificing your wellbeing?

Divorce can hit you like a ton of bricks. 

When Kate Flounders' 12-year marriage crumbled in 2022, it left her grappling not only with the emotional turmoil but also a slew of physical issues she hadn't seen coming, reported The Telegraph.

"I felt as though I’d been hit by a bus," she says. "Everything I was going through emotionally, I felt in my body, too. I wasn’t prepared for how wiped out I was."

It turns out Flounders' experience is far from unique. In the UK, nearly half of marriages end in divorce, and the toll it takes on our health is often overlooked. But there are practical steps you can take to safeguard your wellbeing during this challenging time.

Clinical psychologist Dr Felicity Baker underscores the gravity of divorce: "On the Holmes-Rahe scale, developed to assess the impact of stressful events on health, divorce only comes second to the death of a spouse."

Here are some straightforward strategies to help you cope with the physical and emotional toll of divorce:

1. Acknowledge the stress

You must recognise that divorce is a highly stressful event. Your body's fight-or-flight response kicks in, releasing stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. This state of high anxiety can persist for months or even years.

2. Prioritise sleep

Understand that sleep may be disrupted during a divorce. Don't force it; accept it as normal for a while. Trying to force sleep can be counterproductive. Establish a bedtime routine and create a comfortable sleep environment to help improve your chances of a good night's rest.

3. Mind your diet and exercise

Your usual routines may be disrupted, including diet, exercise, and alcohol consumption. Be mindful of what you eat, and try to maintain some level of physical activity to help manage stress.

4. Avoid quick fixes

Resist the urge to rely on sleeping pills or antidepressants as quick solutions. Instead, seek support from friends, family, or professional counseling to process your emotions and build resilience.

5. Watch tour diet

Pay attention to changes in your eating habits. Emotional distress can impact your gut, leading to digestive issues. Maintain a balanced diet as best as you can.

6. Limit alcohol intake

Be cautious about alcohol consumption, as divorce can lead to increased drinking for some. Keep in mind that men tend to drink more during divorce, which can lead to alcohol problems.

7. Give yourself time

Remember that divorce is a form of loss, and it's okay to grieve. Allow yourself the time and space to go through the emotional stages of grief. The physical symptoms will generally improve as the emotional trauma subsides.

Flounders' experience underscores the importance of self-compassion during this challenging journey. "I gave myself a lot of grace until the fog began to lift, and gradually, it did," she says.

Divorce may feel like an insurmountable obstacle, but by taking practical steps to manage your physical and emotional health, you can navigate this challenging time and emerge on the other side with your wellbeing intact.