After I quit high school and started taking online classes at home due to some family problems, I began experiencing tension...
INTROSPECTION
After I quit high school and started taking online classes at home due to some family problems, I began experiencing tension, anxiety and depression. Before that, I had only read about these terms in books and on social media, but I had never truly understood what they felt like. Suddenly, I found myself trapped in a cycle of overthinking, wondering, "Am I really suffering from mental health issues? Why am I feeling this way? What will happen next?"
To find answers, I turned to books about overcoming depression and managing overthinking. While reading, I encountered a profound question: "What exactly am I depressed about? What is causing my negative thoughts?" This question forced me to reflect deeply on myself. After much self-reflection, I realised that leaving school and isolating myself had made me more introverted and socially withdrawn. Taking online classes had distanced me from friends and normal social interactions. Additionally, I found myself constantly comparing my life to others, especially my school friends and relatives.
One of the biggest influences on my mental state was social media. I often found myself scrolling through WhatsApp statuses and social media posts, seeing my friends enjoying their time together, attending classes and sharing their achievements. It wasn’t jealousy that affected me; rather, it was a fear of missing out and fear of failure. Seeing others progressing made me question my own path, creating a sense of self-doubt.
But then, something started to shift. I began to realise that these negative feelings weren’t something to avoid -they were an opportunity to grow. Rather than letting the comparison and self-doubt consume me, I started to confront them. I asked myself, "What can I learn from these feelings? How can I turn these challenges into personal growth?"
Instead of staying stuck in my negative thoughts, I began using them as a tool for improvement. For example, when I felt like I was falling behind, I realised that this feeling could push me to take action - to work harder, to focus more on my own growth rather than comparing myself to others. I used my anxiety about failure to motivate me to plan better, study harder and set goals for myself. I didn’t ignore the negative feelings; I acknowledged them, understood where they came from and used them to fuel my progress.
Looking back, I see now that negative thoughts don’t have to hold you back. In fact, they can be a powerful tool for change. The key is learning to embrace them and transform them into something constructive. Negative thinking, when managed correctly, can guide us toward the positive changes we want to see in our lives.
I realized that my journey, my pace and my progress are mine alone. Everyone’s path is different, and that’s okay. The fear of missing out or failing doesn’t have to define me. It’s the way we react to those fears, the way we use them to drive us forward, that shapes who we become.
Now, when I feel self-doubt creeping in, I remind myself that it’s not a sign to give up. It’s a sign that I need to take action, to turn those thoughts into fuel for my growth. By embracing my negative feelings, I’ve found a way to transform them into a path of positive growth, and it’s been one of the most empowering lessons I’ve learned.
