He is not interested in me
I read your column recently in ‘Us’ magazine and I think I can use your advice. Actually, I have a crush on this guy ‘U’ who happens to be my class fellow. He is a very smart guy and is very popular among girls. Most of my friends know that I really like him, but the problem is that he is not interested in me. The other day I asked him to play badminton with me, but he clearly refused. I was hurt, but I did not react. Guru, I am a pretty girl and I don’t understand why he is not attracted towards me. He is a flirt and is very friendly with everyone except for me. It’s an embarrassing situation for me as so many people know I have a crush on him and his indifferent attitude towards me give them a chance to make mockery of my love. I am going abroad soon and I want good advice from you. Should I talk ‘U’ directly or should I just leave quietly? I am really upset. Please help. I am counting on you.
Dear Confused Girl,
Sometimes when one is in love, one refuses to see reality, which is the case with you. You are in constant denial. My dear, when you know that ‘U’ is a flirt and is not interested in you then why are you wasting your time running after him? Had he been a little bit attracted towards you, he wouldn’t have refused to play with you. It is clear that ‘U’ has no place for you in his life. And hey, you cannot really blame him for not liking you. In matters of heart, you cannot force anyone to like or dislike you. So, you should not feel bad if he does not give you any attention. Also, you shouldn’t feel embarrassed in front of your friends. Since you are going abroad, chances are your friends will also forget about your puppy love. Last but not least, have some self-respect, girl; you don’t need to talk to ‘U’ on this subject. I think it’s much better if you just ignore him and exit with your chin up. Hopefully, you will get over your crush soon. Good luck!
I hardly get time for other activities
I am a 14-year-old girl, and I study in grade 9 in a prestigious school. I am a regular reader of your column and I am really inspired by the way you solve others’ problems. This is my first letter to you and I really hope you will not disappoint me. My problem is related to my studies. I am so pressurised by my family to study hard that I hardly get any time for other activities. I am into sports but I seldom get to play. It is becoming difficult for me to keep balance between work and play. Secondly, I am so pressed for time that I don’t get to see my favourite shows on TV or indulge in any other leisure activities like reading books or listening to music. Guru, I am living the life of a serf who has to study all the time. They say, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. And this is what’s happening to me. I am turning into a nerdy and boring person. There is so a lot of burden on me and sometimes it is tough to catch up on my sleep. What should I do? Please help.
We live in a competitive age. Unfortunately, these days there is so much pressure on students to get good grades and excel in their studies that poor students are hardly left any time for co-curricular activities. 14 is a wonderful age where one should have a stress-free life. I advise you to talk to your parents. Tell them how difficult it has becoming for you to focus on your studies sans any joyful activities. Sports is a healthy activity and you should take out time to play at least for one hour daily. Set your priorities. Try to manage time judiciously. Don’t take unnecessary stress. Don’t take your studies lightly, but at the same time, don’t exert yourself. When you feel tired, switch on the TV. One needs a break too and you have a right to enjoy your life. You don’t need to feel guilty about anything. Don’t worry about not getting A+. Not all students can get A+ grade. It’s perfectly O.K to get A or B as well. The point is you need to play and act like normal children; otherwise, you will actually end up like a nerd. Good luck!
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