By Dr Chandni Tugnait
The year 2022 has ended, so it is the perfect time to reflect on our past and present stories. We can use this reflection to create positive changes in our lives in 2023. This year, let’s look beyond the typical resolution and goal-setting framework and focus on how to think positive and being kind to ourselves by embracing self-compassion. It can be challenging to transition into a New Year without holding onto old patterns and habits that don’t serve us anymore. This is when self-compassion comes in - accepting yourself with kindness and curiosity, regardless of what happened in the past or how you feel.
Importance of self-love or self-compassion: Self-compassion is not about being overly indulgent or complacent. Instead, it means taking responsibility for your actions while treating yourself with compassion. It involves understanding that mistakes are part of human nature, learning from them, and not getting caught up in beating yourself up for them. A compassionate approach can positively influence your outlook and interactions with others. It also becomes easier to handle difficult emotions without judgement, blame or self-criticism and make more mindful choices in the present moment.
Promote a positive mind-set by rewriting your story: Rewriting your story is a great way to start incorporating self-compassion into your life this year. This means identifying stories you tell yourself about past events or experiences, reframing them positively, and sharing that new narrative with those around you. Letting go of the old story allows us to create something new, which can be incredibly liberating and empowering.
Identify areas of improvement: When you reflect on the past year, acknowledge what worked for you, what didn’t, and areas you would like to improve upon. Once you have identified these points, it’s time to set attainable goals. Think broadly about your actions going forward while remaining realistic. Do not forget to reward yourself for small successes along the way!
Be kind to yourself: One of the most important things is to be kind to yourself. Mistakes are inevitable and provide learning opportunities. Therefore, self-compassion is quite vital in rewriting your story. It allows for forgiveness when things do not go as planned and encourages one to move forward anyway.
Start each morning by setting intentions: Wake up early each morning and take some time to reflect on what kind of day you want to have; this will help motivate you throughout the day. Practice gratitude, mindfulness, meditation or journaling; recognise your thoughts without judging them.
Give yourself permission to fail: Allow yourself permission to fail from time-to-time without judgement. Everyone fails at some point, but it doesn’t have to be seen as indicative of failure overall; use it instead as a learning.
Focus on progress rather than perfection: You don’t need everything to be perfect all at once. Focus instead on celebrating even small successes.
Prioritise ‘me-time’ every day: Allow yourself enough time each day through activities such as yoga, mindfulness practices or simply enjoying silence – this helps maintain balance between mind, body and spirit
Talk kindly with yourself: Pay attention to any unhelpful thoughts going through your mind - question them if necessary! Be mindful of your language and thoughts.
Embrace change: Don’t be afraid to try something new. Making changes in our lives is often essential for personal growth.
So this new year, let’s find ways to have a positive mindset for the future. Allow 2023 to be a year full of possibilities and personal growth while creating a solid foundation for future success!
*Dr Chandni Tugnait is MD (Alternative Medicine), Psychotherapist, Life Coach, Business Coach, NLP Expert, Healer and Founder & Director – Gateway of Healing.