US

COMIC RELIEF

US
By US Desk
Fri, 05, 20

The county fire department was called to put out the fire. The fire was more than the county fire department could handle....

How old are the dinosaur bones...

Some tourists in the Chicago Museum of Natural History are marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard, “Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?”

The guard replies, “They are three million, four years, and six months old.”

“That’s an awfully exact number,” says the tourist. “How do you know their age so precisely?”

The guard answers, “Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.”

Volunteer fire department

A fire started on some grasslands near a farm.

The county fire department was called to put out the fire. The fire was more than the county fire department could handle. Someone suggested that a nearby volunteer bunch be called. Despite some doubt that the volunteer outfit would be of any assistance, the call was made.

The volunteers arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They rumbled straight towards the fire, drove right into the middle of the flames and stopped! The firemen jumped off the truck and frantically started spraying water in all directions. Soon they had snuffed out the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two easily-controlled parts.

Watching all this, the farmer was so impressed with the volunteer fire department’s work and was so grateful that his farm had been spared, that right there on the spot he presented the volunteers with a check for $1,000. A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds.

“That ought to be obvious,” he responded, wiping ashes off his coat. “The first thing we’re gonna do is get the brakes fixed on our fire truck!”

In a Zoom meeting – which one are you

The one who shows up early prepared to take notes.

The one asking everyone how they’re feeling right now

The one analysing how much more efficient this could have been done.

The one who put thought into their backdrop.

The one who doesn’t speak the entire meeting until you bring up the one thing they want to talk about.

The one who asks the clarifying questions.

The one doing three other things while also meeting.

The one who’s wearing pajamas on the bottom and a professional shirt up top.