I am a 12-year-old girl. I have one sister and two brothers. My mother is a single parent. My father went to Malaysia on visit visa for one year.
Nobody likes me
Dear Guru,
I am a 12-year-old girl. I have one sister and two brothers. My mother is a single parent. My father went to Malaysia on visit visa for one year. Initially, he was in contact with us. Although he did not send any money, he used to tell my mom that our tough days would soon be over. Then he stopped calling my mom and just disappeared.
Now, my mother is running the house single-handedly and it’s very difficult for her to make both ends meet. I study in an English medium school, but my class fellows are not good. Guru, there is a girl who is a topper in my class and she is very proud. She thinks she’s very beautiful and I am not. Well, she is right in a way, but my mother keeps telling me that I am pretty. I was a topper in Grade III, but now I am not. I also got mature at a very young age. I know things that an average 12 year older doesn’t know. Guru, my problem is that I don’t want to go to school because of my class fellows. My siblings also tease me a lot. I am very depressed. It seems like nobody likes me. Sometimes I feel like running away from home. What should I do?
Broken Angel
Dear Broken Angel,
I can understand your feelings, my dear. At your age when most girls play with dolls in their safe havens, you are facing life’s tough challenges. It’s really painful for you to know that your father is alive yet he is not around to take care of you. Your mother is a very brave woman who is raising her children single-handedly; hats off to her.
I know it must be difficult for you to cope with your present situation but, dear, you need to be brave like your mother. She has no clue where her husband is, yet she has not lost hope and is calm and collected. She is right; you should not pay heed to your class fellow. You are as brainy and beautiful as she is. The only thing is that you need to feel confident from inside. Don’t get irritated if your siblings or class fellows tease you. They may tease you but it does not mean that they hate you. Just ignore them and concentrate on your studies. Don’t feel upset. You are a lovely girl and I am sure people like you. Think about your mom who loves you. Running away from home or school will be just an escape, not a solution. Whenever you feel sad, sit with your mother and share your feelings with her. I am sure you will feel better. Good luck!
I am fed up with my cousin
Salaam Guru,
I am a 16 year-old girl. I study in one of the elite schools of Karachi. I have been reading your magazine since I was 12. I really like the way you solve problems and hope you can solve mine too. Actually, the problem is my cousin, A, who is the same age as I am and lives near our hometown. Our families meet frequently. Guru, sometimes she is really friendly and talks to me and sometimes she just ignores me. She has a boyfriend and her family is not aware of this. In our family, having relationships is strictly forbidden. Whenever A comes to our house, she forces me to give her my phone so she can talk to her boyfriend. She always brags about her friends and often lies. There have been times when she would tell others that I said something although I had not. She told one of my cousins that I had commented negatively about her hairstyle. I have talked to my mother about this and she told me to ignore her. But, Guru, A’s offensive behaviour is bothering me now and I don’t want to meet her. Unfortunately, that is out of my hands as we have a lot of family gatherings.
Crazy Girl
Dear Crazy Girl,
There are all kinds of people in this world. Some are genuine and some are fake. Your cousin A is one of those people who are habitual liars. Your mother is right; you should ignore your cousin. I don’t understand why you are putting up with A’s irrational behaviour when you know that she is a liar and is not sincere with you. I know you cannot break up with her since she is your cousin, but you can distance yourself from her slowly and gradually. Even if she wants to share some juicy gossip, avoid listening to her. Be diplomatic; don’t show that you know how mean she is, but be careful in dealing with her in future. Good luck!
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