My life has been miserable ever since my breakup. Do you think I heal with time? What should I do to get my life back on track?
I want my life back on track
Dear Guru,
I am a 17-year-old girl. I have dealt with a lot of drama in my life related to friends and this guy, K, I was dating. I convinced myself I loved him and was too blinded to his faults. I thought he cared for me, but he turned out to be a narcissist. He used to impose his will upon me, and I always used to think he was right. I let an immature guy control my life, which made me lose my friends. He would hold me accountable for his behavior because of some things related to my past that I was scared to tell him. While I was in a relationship with him, I hurt everyone and made a bad impression on everyone, including my friends and parents. Now that it is over, I don’t think anyone will like me or want to talk to me or accept me since a lot of people knew about us. I want people to forget about that phase in my life and understand that I’ve changed and have understood my worth. I am still very young, and I want a good future and friends and want to make my parents proud. But I feel depressed and lonely all the time. My life has been miserable ever since my breakup. Do you think I heal with time? What should I do to get my life back on track?
Lonely MK
Dear Lonely MK,
I am sorry to hear that you’ve been through such a tough time. It sounds like you’ve been dealing with a lot of emotional turmoil, and it’s completely understandable to feel depressed and lonely after such experiences. Healing from this kind of situation can take time, but it is possible.
Firstly, it’s important to remember that you are not defined by your past. People can change, and it’s okay to leave that phase of your life behind you. It’s also important to recognize that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and you should never feel pressured to stay in a toxic relationship.
To start healing and get your life back on track, consider seeking help from someone you trust, whether it’s a friend, family member, or therapist. Talk to them about your feelings because having someone to listen to you can be incredibly helpful. Also, take care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. Eat well, and engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation.
We all make mistakes, but the important thing is to learn from them. Reflect on your past relationship and the dynamics that were at play. Use this experience as an opportunity to learn about yourself and what you want and need in future relationships. Next time you meet someone, don’t forget to set boundaries in your relationships to protect yourself from being manipulated or mistreated. It’s okay to say no to things that make you uncomfortable.
You feel awkward around family and friends, but these are the very people who can support you emotionally. Surround yourself with positive and supportive people who uplift you and encourage your growth. Focus on your future and set goals for yourself and work towards them. Whether it’s pursuing your education, finding a fulfilling career, or pursuing your passions, focusing on your future can help you move forward.
Try not to blame yourself. Be gentle with yourself and practice self-compassion. It’s okay to make mistakes and to take time to heal. It is also okay to feel depressed and lonely, but it’s also important to take steps towards healing and building a positive future for yourself. With time, self-care, and support, you can overcome this difficult period in your life.
Good luck
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