I want to convey to them that I am still very young and that rushing into marriage may lead to challenges down the road....
My parents are worried about my marriage
Dear Guru
I am a 22-year-old individual, and my parents have been pressing me to get married. They say waiting for the perfect partner is not a wise decision, and that I may regret if I don’t act now. While I understand family values and character are important in a life partner, I am also concerned about the financial aspect of marriage.
Having witnessed my mother’s struggles to meet basic needs due to financial constraints, I have come to realize the importance of financial stability in a marriage. I want a husband who is financially secure so I don’t have to go through the struggle my mother had to. Also, while growing up, I noticed that my cousins and friends had everything they wanted that money could buy, but my sister and I had just the basics.
Guru, I am at a point in my life where I feel it is crucial to focus on building a secure future for myself and my potential family. I wish to marry someone who is financially strong, not only for my peace of mind but also to ensure that my family does not face the same type of financial struggles we all endured.
However, my parents seem eager for me to settle down without fully understanding my perspective on this matter. I want to convey to them that I am still very young and that rushing into marriage may lead to challenges down the road.
How can I convince my parents?
Girl in Trouble
Dear Girl in Trouble,
Confidence, education, family values, kindness, and integrity are key things one should look for in a partner. If you find someone with these qualities, go for it even if he earns a moderate salary. Financial circumstances tend to evolve over time, and if one works hard, prosperity often follows. However, good people don’t come around often. Wanting a financially strong husband is all right, but if the guy is decent, kind and considerate. A man who is rich but not have the above mentioned qualities can make life hard for his wife. Think on it.
When conveying your decision to your parents, approach the conversation with sincerity and empathy. Assure them of your genuine desire to get married but clarify that you wish to do so with a partner who aligns with your criteria. Emphasize that the right person may take time to come around, but would be worth the wait.
More importantly, approach this discussion with kindness, politeness, and respect. At all times, stay reasonable and give logical reasons for what you want in life. Remember that parents try to do what is best for their children. By conveying your thoughts in a kind manner, you are more likely to gain their support.
Good luck!
I want new friends
Dear Guru,
I am an 18-year-old girl currently studying in college. I am very worried about my current group of friends. The issue is they have become excessively showy and inclined towards frequent bragging, thereby creating an environment that I find very uncomfortable.
As university will start soon, I am somewhat relieved at the thought of a fresh start. But, three members from my current group of friends will be joining me at the same university.
Also, I have difficulty in making new friends. It looks like everyone associates me with my group.
Guru, what should I do?
Anxious Girl
Dear Anxious Girl,
The transition from college to university is a significant life event, and it often opens doors to new opportunities and connections. My advice to you is simple: be patient. Allow the natural course of events at the university to unfold, and you will find that there are many individuals eager to form meaningful friendships.
In university settings, you will find other students seeking genuine, new connections, and the diversity of backgrounds and interests creates opportunities for making new friendships.
Also, don’t forget to focus on becoming the type of friend you aspire to have. Demonstrate kindness, openness, and sincerity, and you will naturally attract individuals who share similar values.
Good luck!
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