Twitter wit

By US Desk
Fri, 09, 23

Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner): last night i had cereal with milk for the first time. life changing....

Twitter wit


* Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner): last night i had cereal with milk for the first time. life changing.

* Kat McPhee (@katharinemcphee): To the pack of paps stalking me while I’m in the middle of the ocean in Europe - Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner are just two yachts over. Please focus on what truly matters.

* Lady Gaga (@ladygaga): why do people look at me like I'm crazy when i use coupons at grocery or try bargaining at retail, IM FROM NEW YORK WHERE IS THE SALE RACK

* ParisHilton (@ParisHilton) Jealousy is a disease get well soon.....

Twitter wit

Pun intended

Twitter wit

* To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

* Ladies, if he can’t appreciate your jokes, you need to let that mango.

* Geology rocks but Geography is where it’s at!

* I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something.

* A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.

* So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means? It’s not the end of the world!

* My friend drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how his Mercedes bends.

* Becoming a vegetarian is one big missed steak.

Laugh lines

Twitter wit

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Harold the computer guy, to come over. Harold clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call. As he was walking away, I called after him, “So, what was wrong?”

He replied, “It was an ID ten T error.”

I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, “An, ID ten T error? What’s that ... in case I need to fix it again?”

The computer guy grinned.... “Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?”

“No,” I replied.

“Write it down,” he said, “and I think you’ll figure it out.”

So, I wrote out ... I D 1 0 T

I used to like Harold....